The other day I heard of a young corporate executive who took his own life, leaving behind a distraught wife and infant child. How shocked his colleagues were to learn of this, especially when they had been with him just a few hours earlier. How devastating for his parents and family! It deeply saddened me and led me to think of what I, as an individual, could do about this. Perhaps I could begin by just creating a little awareness amongst people, about the fact that suicide is preventable.
I recall a time when I was volunteering with a mental health support helpline and had received an SOS call. I had recently completed a basic training on suicide prevention and the red flags were clear in my mind. From the information the caller gave, I could gauge that he was at risk of harming himself and I was able to direct him to see a psychiatrist immediately. The next day he reported that he had started taking medication. Awareness of suicide prevention helped me help this person that day.
Some Statistics
Globally, close to 800 000 people die by suicide every year; that’s one person every 40 seconds. For each suicide, there are more than 20 suicide attempts. Suicide is a significant public health concern in India, as well. According to WHO data, the suicide rate in India is 16.4 per 100,000 for women (6th highest in the world) and 25.8 for men (ranking 22nd). The National Crime Records Bureau (NCRB) statistics showed a consistent rise in suicide rates from 9.9 per lakh population in 2017 to 12.4 per lakh population in 2022. 2,30,314 Indians, mainly between 18-44 years, die due to suicide each year, a staggering and alarming number!
Who is Vulnerable?
The prominent reasons for suicide are depression, relationship and family issues, financial issues and the burden of chronic illness. People who are particularly at risk are those with:
1. a family history of depression or suicide;
2. significant trauma or negative life events in the recent past leading to feelings of helplessness/hopelessness/worthlessness;
3. chronic negative events;
4. past history of depression or addiction;
5. inadequate coping skills with stress;
6. mental health issues like substance abuse, bipolar disorder, schizophrenia, borderline personality disorder
People contemplating suicide typically have thoughts such as :
“This will solve all problems”;
“I feel trapped”;
“I feel empty inside”;
“This is the only escape route for me, I have no other option”;
“Life is meaningless”
along with feelings of hopelessness and isolation.
Warning Signs/Red Flags:
Usually, there are always some warning signs before a suicide attempt. Here are some common indicators to assess the risk and recognize if a person is suicidal…these are the RED FLAGS to watch out for!
1. Talking/ writing/ thinking about dying or death (making statements such as “I want to die” I’m going to kill myself”, or “I wish I hadn’t been born”)
2. Planning/ looking for means to take your own life, such as buying excess pills, pesticides or browsing internet for ways.
3. Isolation from family and friends (Withdrawing from social contact or activities and wanting to be left alone.)
4. Mood changes, anger and / or anxiety spells
5. Feelings/ thoughts of hopelessness, helplessness, worthlessness
6. Substance abuse / increasing use of alcohol or drugs.
7. A change in normal routine, including eating or sleeping patterns.
8. Reckless / risky/ self-destructive behaviours, such as using drugs or driving recklessly.
9. Giving away valuable possessions / belongings or putting things in order without reason
10. Saying goodbye to people as if they won’t be seen again
11. Personality changes or sudden change in behaviour (e.g. from depressed to calm without any help or therapy)
12. Previous suicide attempt/s
Key Myths and Facts
i) Talking about suicide might increase the chance of a person acting on it.
No, it won’t. If someone is in crisis or depressed, asking if he or she is thinking about suicide can help, so don’t hesitate to start the conversation.
ii) People who talk about suicide are just attention-seekers, selfish, cowards or weak.
No, they are in distress and giving warning signals that need to be taken seriously. If someone says they are feeling suicidal, it’s important to be sensitive, listen with empathy and ask direct questions such as: “Are you thinking about hurting yourself?” “Are you thinking about suicide?” or “What have you planned?”
The person experiencing significant emotional pain finds it difficult to consider different views or see a way out of their situation. It could also be the effect of a psychiatric illness. You can try to help them articulate their thoughts.
iii) Suicide can’t be prevented.
Yes, it can be prevented. Therapy and medications can greatly reduce the risk of suicide. Suicidal tendencies arise from a combination of genes, mental health conditions and environmental risk factors. Those who contemplate suicide, often experience intense emotional pain, hopelessness and have a negative view of life or their futures. Treatments and interventions do work and could save lives. It’s important to get the right treatment for any prevalent mental illnesses and also strengthen life-skills and healthy coping skills through appropriate training and counselling.
How can you help?
You can help by becoming observant and noticing these indicators in people around you. If a friend or loved one talks or behaves in a way that makes you believe he or she is at risk, try to talk them out of the crisis and seek help from a trained professional as quickly as possible. Encourage the person to call a suicide helpline number or confide in someone they can trust. The person may even need to be hospitalized until the suicidal crisis has passed.
You are not responsible for preventing someone from taking their own life, but your intervention may help them see that other options are available. Remember, it is not a crime The Mental Healthcare Act, 2017 decriminalizes suicide, assuring dignity and a humane perspective to the issue as well as adequate medical relief to those attempting it. This requires us to re-examine the language and terminology we use to discuss suicide, and mental health in general. It is imperative that we veer away from using words that imply shame, judgment, or indicate that the person has committed a crime or sin. Let our conversations be based on empathy and compassion, focusing on the humanity of the person and their individual needs.
Let’s reach out to that one precious life out there that can be saved!
– by Chitra Apte, a qualified psychologist & NLP coach who switched to the mental health and emotional wellbeing space, to focus on what was really close to her heart, after 30 years of being a Software Professional